Night World : Secret Vampire Chapter 4

Poppy was staring without appetite at a dinner party tray of chicken nug hold backs and french fries when Dr. Franklin came in the room.The tests were everyplace. The CAT scan had been either mature, if claustrophobic, merely the ERCP had been awful. Poppy could still rule the ghost of the tube in her throat e genuinely time she sw entirelyowed.Youre leaving only this great hospital food, Dr. Franklin give tongue to with gentle humor. Poppy managed a smile for him.He went on berateing simply close innocuous things. He didnt say anything about the test results, and Poppy had no estimation when they were supposed(p) to come in. She was suspicious of Dr. Franklin, though. Something about him, the gentle way he patted her foot on a lower floor the blanket or the shadows slightly his eyeball . . .When he casually suggested that Poppys begin might expect to come for a low walk down the sign of the zodiac, Poppys suspicion crystallized.Hes passing to reveal her. Hes go t the results, unless he doesnt want me to get by.Her plan was made in the same instant. She yawned and tell, Go on, mamma Im a little bit sleepy. wherefore she lay impale and keep out her eyes.As soon as they were g unmatched, she got off the ass. She watched their retreating backs as they went down the hall into another doorway. Then, in her stocking feet, she quietly followed them.She was delayed for several minutes at the nursing point. Just stretching my legs, she said to a nurse who looked enquiringly at her, and she pretended to be walking at random. When the nurse picked up a clipboard and went into one of the patients rooms, Poppy hurried on down the corridor.The room at the end was the waiting room shed seen it earlier. It had a TV and a do kitchen setup so relatives could hang out in comfort. The door was unfastened and Poppy approached it stealthily. She could attend the low rumble of Dr. Franklins voice, but she couldnt teach what he was saying. actually cautiously Poppy march on closer.She chanced one look around the door.She saw at once that there was no have for caution. E rattlingone in that room was on the whole occupied.Dr. Franklin was sitting on one of the couches. Beside him was an African-American woman with glasses on a chain around her neck. She was wearing the duster coat of a doctor.On the other couch was Poppys stepfather, lessening. His normally perfect dark pig was slightly mussed, his rock-steady jaw was working. He had his arm around her spawn. Dr. Franklin was talking to both of them, his hand on her mothers shoulder.And Poppys mother was sobbing.Poppy pulled back from the doorway.Oh, my God. Ive got it.Shed never seen her mother cry in the beginning. not when Poppys grandmother had died, not during the divorce from Poppys father. Her mothers specialty was head with things she was the best coper Poppy had ever bopn. only(prenominal) now . . .Ive got it. Ive definitely got it.Still, maybe it wasnt so bad. Her mom was shocked, okay, that was natural. provided it didnt mean that Poppy was discharge to die or anything. Poppy had all of modern medicine on her side.She kept telling herself this as she edged away from the waiting room.She didnt edge fast enough, though. Before she got out of earshot, she hear her mothers voice, raised in some(prenominal)thing same anguish.My baby. Oh, my little girl.Poppy froze.And then Cliff, loud and hot under the collar(p floridicate) Youre sinking to tell me theres nothing?Poppy couldnt feel her own breathing. Against her will, she moved back to the door.Dr. Loftus is an oncologist an expert on this physique of cancer. She can explain better than I can, Dr. Franklin was saying.Then a new voice came the other doctor. At branch Poppy could only catch scattered phrases that didnt seem to mean anything adenocarcinoma, splenic venous occlusion, Stage Three. Medical jargon. Then Dr. Loftus said, To put it simply, the problem is that the neoplasm h as broadcast. Its spread to the liver and the lymph nodes around the pancreas. That means its unresectable we cant operate.Cliff said, besides chemotherapy . . .We might try a combination of radiation and chemotherapy with something called 5-fluorouracil. Weve had some results with that. unless now I wont misinform you. At best it may improve her survival time by a few weeks. At this point, were looking at palliative measures ways to reduce her pain and improve the qualityof the time she has left. Do you ascertain?Poppy could hear choking sobs from her mother, but she couldnt seem to move. She felt as if she were listening to some play on the radio. As if it had nothing to do with her.Dr. Franklin said, there atomic number 18 some research protocols right here in southern California. Theyre experimenting with immunotherapy and cryogenic surgery. Again, were talking about palliation rather than a cure curse it Cliffs voice was explosive. Youre talking about a little gir l How did this pull out to to Stage Three without anybody noticing? This kid was dancing all night two days ago.Mr. Hilgard, Im sorry, Dr. Loftus said so softly that Poppy could barely pick up the words. This build of cancer is called a silent disease, because there are very few symptoms until its very far advanced. Thats why the survival rate is so low. And I have to tell you that Poppy is only the second teenager Ive seen with this kind of tumor. Dr. Franklin made an extremely acute diagnosis when he decided to transport her in for testing.I should have known, Poppys mother said in a thick voice. I should have made her come in sooner. I should have I should have There was a banging vocalize. Poppy looked around the door, for get to be inconspicuous. Her mother was hitting the Formica table over and over. Cliff was trying to finish her.Poppy reeled back.Oh, God, Ive got to get out of here. I cant see this. I cant look at this.She sour and walked back down the hall. Her l egs moved. Just like always. Amazing that they still worked.And anything around her was just like always. The nursing station was still decorated for the Fourth of July. Her suitcase was still on the aggrandize windowpane seat in her room. The hardwood floor was still solid underneath her.Everything was the same but how could it be? How could the walls be still standing? How could the TV be blaring in the next room?Im going to die, Poppy thought. peculiarly enough, she didnt feel frightened. What she felt was vastly surprised. And the surprise kept coming, over and over, with every thought being interrupted by those four words.Its my fault because (Im going to die) I didnt go to the doctors sooner.Cliff said damn for me (Im going to die). I didnt know he liked me enough to swear.Her mind was racing wildly.Something in me, she thought. Im going to die because of something thats inside me, like that alien in the movie. Its in me right now. Right now.She put both workforce to her s tomach, then pulled up her T-shirt to stare at her abdomen. The skin was smooth, unblemished. She didnt feel any pain.But its in there and Im going to die because of it. Die soon. I rarity how soon? I didnt hear them talk about that.I need throng.Poppy reached for the phone with a feeling that her hand was detached from her body. She dialed, withdrawing, Please be there.But this time it didnt work. The phone rang and rang. When the answering machine came on, Poppy said, Call me at the hospital. Then she hung up and stared at the plastic pitcher of ice peeing by her bedside.Hell get in later, she thought. And then hell call me. I just have to hang on until then.Poppy wasnt sure why she thought this, but suddenly it was her goal. To hang on until she could talk to James. She didnt need to think about anything until then she just had to survive. Once she talked to James, she could figure out what she was supposed to be feeling, what she was supposed to do now.There was a light knock at the door. Startled, Poppy looked up to see her mother and Cliff. For a moment all she could focus on on was their baptismal fonts, which gave her the strange illusion that the faces were floating in midair.Her mother had red and swollen eyes. Cliff was pale, like a piece of crumpled white paper, and his jaw looked stubbly and dark in contrast.Oh, my God, are they going to tell me? They cant they cant make me listen to it.Poppy had the wild impulse to run. She was on the verge of panic.But her mother said, Sweetie, some of your friends are here to see you. Phil called them this afternoon to let them know you were in the hospital, and they just arrived.James, Poppy thought, something springing free in her chest. But James wasnt part of the group that came crowding through the doorway. It was mostly girls from school.It doesnt matter. Hell call later. I dont have to think now.As a matter of fact, it was impossible to think with so many visitors in the room. And that was good. It was incredible that Poppy could sit there and talk to them when part of her was farther away than Neptune, but she did talk and that kept her reason glum off.None of them had any idea that something serious was wrong with her. non even Phil, who was at his brotherly best, very kind and considerate. They talked about familiar things, about parties and Rollerblading and music and books. Things from Poppys old life, which suddenly seemed to have been a century years ago.Cliff talked, too, nicer than he had been since the days when he was courting Poppys mother.But finally the visitors left, and Poppys mother stayed. She touched Poppy every so often with hands that shook slightly. If I didnt know, Id know, Poppy thought. She isnt acting like Mom at all.I think Ill stay here tonight, her mother said. not quite managing to sound offhand. The nurse said I can sleep on the window seat its really a couch for parents. Im just trying to decide whether I should run back to the house and get some things.Yes, go, Poppy said. There was nothing else she could say and still pretend that she didnt know. Besides, her mom undoubtedly involve some time by herself, away from this.Just as her mother left, a nurse in a flowered blouse and green scrub up pants came in to take Poppys temperature and blood pressure. And then Poppy was alone.It was late. She could still hear a TV, but it was far away. The door was ajar, but the hallway alfresco was dim. A hush seemed to have fallen over the ward.She felt very alone, and the pain was gnawing deep inside her. Beneath the smooth skin of her abdomen, the tumor was making itself known.Worst of all, James hadnt called. How could he not call? Didnt he know she needed him?She wasnt sure how long she could go on not thinking about It.Maybe the best thing would be to try to sleep. Get unconscious. Then she couldnt think.But as soon as she turned out the light and closed her eyes, phantoms swirled around her. Not images of pretty brassy gi rls skeletons. Coffins. And worst of all, an endless darkness.If I die, I wont be here. Will I be anywhere? Or will I just Not Be at all?It was the scariest thing shed ever imagined, Not-Being. And she was definitely thinking now, she couldnt help it. Shed lost control. A galloping fear consumed her, made her shiver under the rough sheet and thin blankets. Im going to die, Im going to die, Im going to Poppy.Her eyes flew open. For a second she couldnt identify the black silhouette in the change room. She had a wild idea that it was Death itself coming to get her.Then she said, James?I wasnt sure if you were asleep.Poppy reached for the bedside button that turned on the light, but James said, No, leave it off. I had to sneak past the nurses, and I dont want them to throw me out.Poppy swallowed, her hands clenched on a fold of blanket. Im sword lily you came, she said. I thought you werent going to come. What she really wanted was to throw herself into his fortification and sob and scream.But she didnt. It wasnt just that shed never done anything like that with him before it was something about him that stopped her. Something she couldnt put her finger on, but that made her feel almost . . . frightened.The way he was standing? The fact that she couldnt see his face? All she knew was that James suddenly seemed like a stranger.He turned around and very slowly closed the heavy door.Darkness. Now the only light came in through the window. Poppy felt curiously isolated from the rest period of the hospital, from the rest of the world.And that should have been good, to be alone with James, protected from everything else. If only she werent having this uncanny feeling of not recognizing him.You know the test results, he said quietly. It wasnt a question.My mom doesnt know I know, Poppy said. How could she be talking coherently when all she wanted to do was scream? I overheard the doctors telling her. . . . James, Ive got it. And . . . its bad its a bad kind of canc er. They said its already spread. They said Im going to . . . She couldnt get the last word out, even though it was shrieking through her mind.Youre going to die, James said. He still seemed quiet and centered. Detached.I read up on it, James went on, walking over to the window and looking out. I know how bad it is. The articles said there was a lot of pain. spartan pain.James, Poppy gasped.Sometimes they have to do surgery just to try to stop the pain. But whatever they do, it wont save you. They can fill you full of chemicals and vaticinate you, and youll still die. Probably before the end of summer.James It will be your last summer James, for Gods sake It was almost a scream. Poppy was breathing in great shaking gulps, clinging to the blankets. Why are you doing this to me?He turned and in one movement seized her wrist, his fingers closing over the plastic hospital bracelet. I want you to understand that they cant help you, he said, ragged and intense. Do you understand that? Yes, I understand, Poppy said. She could hear the mounting hysteria in her own voice. But is that what you came here to say? Do you want to kill me?His fingers tightened painfully. No I want to save you. Then he let out a breath and repeated it more quietly, but with no less intensity. I want to save you, Poppy.Poppy spent a few moments just getting air in and out of her lungs. It was hard to do it without dissolving into sobs. Well, you cant, she said at last. Nobody can.Thats where youre wrong. Slowly he released her wrist and gripped the bed take instead. Poppy, theres something Ive got to tell you. Something about me.James . . . Poppy could breathe now, but she didnt know what to say. As far as she could tell, James had gone crazy. In a way, if everything else hadnt been so awful, she might have been flattered. James had lost his consummate cool over her. He was upset enough about her situation to go solely nonlinear.You really do care, she said softly, with a laugh that was half a sob. She put a hand on his where it rested on the bed rail.He laughed shortly in turn. His hand flipped over to grasp hers approximately then he pulled away. You have no idea, he said in a terse, strained voice.Looking out the window, he added, You think you know everything about me, but you dont. Theres something very important that you dont know.By now Poppy just felt numb. She couldnt understand why James kept harping on himself, when she was the one about to die. But she tried to conjure up some sort of gentleness for him as she said, You can tell me anything. You know that.But this is something you wont believe. Not to mention that its breaking the laws.The law?The laws. I go by incompatible laws than you. Human laws dont mean much to us, but our own are supposed to be unbreakable.James, Poppy said, with blank terror. He really was losing his mind.I dont know the right way to say it. I feel like somebody in a bad horror movie. He shrugged, and said without turning, I k now how this sounds, but . . . Poppy, Im a vampire.Poppy sat still on the bed for a moment. Then she groped out wildly toward the bedside table. Her fingers closed on a cud of little crescent-shaped plastic basins and she threw the whole stack at him.You sobbing she screamed, and reached for something else to throw.